Then and Now

Then and Now

As one grows older (and if you are like me), one can become obsessed with improving yourself and your skills in which ever vocation you choose in this life. Somewhere between the children, cats, dogs, friends, family and the midlife crises’ of life, one can get lost. Completely lost.

I mean in your twenties, you set out a list of 100 things you want to do and achieve before you die. Perhaps, before 30, you decide to get married and if you are disciplined you get to check off 20 of the 100 things you wanted to do before you kick the bucket. Then shortly after the wedding ring, comes the children, the grindstone of work, and before you wipe your eyes, you are 40 and you’ve hit the notorious mid-life scenario.

I can not tell you much about the theory of the mid-life syndrome. What I can share, is my experiences so far, even though I am not 40 yet, I can completely see why people called it a “crises”.

Approaching 40:

  1. I started to intensely scrutinise every single relationship in my life and I got rid of time wasters. Yes, time wasters are people who come into your life and they take and take and take without so much as a thank you.  I have so much more time for the people I really want to spend time with – including my family!
  2. I came into complete rebellion of my physical environment – my home, my office, my car – everything! Somehow the energy, the rooms, the spaces, the porch, the cupboards and the tables just didn’t suite my new found inner wisdom anymore. It all had to go! (My poor husband, better buckle up Bucco, more changes coming!)
  3. I made a massive change in my career. Yes, Sumika is 100% completely the opposite to the corporate environment I was used to.

I can tell you I am still working on: my weight, my discipline, fixing my sleeping patterns and editing my somewhat colourful vocabulary.  I can tell you that I still take thousands of photos and travel is still my legal addiction. I am still socially awkward and incredibly intense in every single belief or course of action I take. I still get upset with my husband and I yell at the dog.

But what I realised the other day, when picking up my first semi-professional camera is this: I’ve come a long way baby!  The background is: my latest greatest, state-of-the-art digital camera had to go in for repairs and a general service. With my kids playing in the backyard with a breathtaking sunset, I just couldn’t resist taking pictures and I went to scratch out my old baby. It felt incredibly plastic and clumsy to work with an old camera, but as soon as I saw the quality of the images and the lack of functionality on the equipment, I realised that I’ve come so far from those first pictures I took for the school newspaper!

I have evolved and grown in leaps and bounds – not only as photographer but as a human soul having a physical experience! Yes there are most certainly parts where I would make different choices if given the opportunity. But then the question becomes – would I? For how would I know what I know today without the reservoir of experiences to draw wisdom from? Am I who I am without any physical life experiences – or am I the sum total of my experiences on earth? (These are very Kabbalistic questions!)

I say, every now and then – PICK UP THAT OLD CAMERA! Go to those old videos, look at your first  painting or hobbyist boat you built! Go back and visit those tokens or markers of your past – midlife crises or not! Go back to connect with something that reminds you of your emotional and spiritual mindset of that period in your life. That will encourage you to take that step forward and overcome whatever obstacle is in your way. It will help you see how far you’ve come, and prove to you that you can overcome anything you set your mind to!  The Vikings used this technique for many years and it is believed to have played a key part in their combative victories! If you would like to have more information about the process of Kabbalah (a path to speed up your life experiences so that you live with more life in your years), contact us and we will help you join the next available group.

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