And there I was, 26 years later, in my kitchen, busy making candles for my daughter’s new entrepreneurial venture. Nothing unusual right? Certainly not “blog worthy” I suppose?
Except for one thing: how familiar the scene in front me felt, smelled, sounded and looked! Being the forever independent soul that I am, at around age 15 I decided that I did not want to take money from my parents. We were a middle class family and even though we always had enough food and basic provision in the house, there was nothing glam and abundant about our lifestyle. I knew that if I wanted a shot at experiencing the things on my bucket list, that I would have to go out there and make it happen for myself. I always had something big driving me forward into new adventures, and I suppose this was my first playing ground to practice for the fair amount of success were to experience in in life.
Just like that – I was teleported back to what I thought was “lost” memories of icy cold nights and cooking hot days in our family garage, working to fulfil orders. I could recall incredible detail like how long to heat the wax, the timing of pouring the hot liquid into the mould. All needing to happen while immersing it in cold water to ensure the cold seals the edges of the mould and not leak out all the wax into the water. But then you also have to make sure that the water do not enter the wax inside the mould and make unwanted craters! Quite tricky! But just like that – I made the first candle perfectly today! It all came back in seconds. Which says a lot about the subconscious mind I so often write about in this blog section!
It was also a good trip down memory lane and it grounded me in a sense, as I’ve been in my mind a lot this week. I remember how my mom and I used the red wax from the cheese skins to dye the wax a ruby red. More importantly, it gave me an opportunity to reflect on how far I’ve come and where I started. It also reminded me of a time in my life when I still had a big tinkle in my eye – the innocence of youth. I still thought the world was my oyster and that all people are good and have good intent. And that, if you would just work hard and please everyone, you could get exactly what you wanted in life.
Parts of the last statement is true, you can achieve/manifest whatever you want in life with hard work, but thank GOODNESS, I’ve learned to stop trying to please people all the time.
My candle business grew quickly to include a function décor hire department and the creativity of our products went beyond just normal white pillar candles. I remember having to pack up stock and pack it out again at markets and stalls. I remember what bravery it took me, a somewhat shy 16 year old, to stand in front of people and charge my full worth. Sometimes challenged, sometimes admired for my initiative as a youngster, sometimes leaving and only selling one candle for a mere buck or two. Sometimes handling a customer complaint for a product comeback and having to repeat the whole order – at my own cost. But always finding a way to pluck together the courage to try again tomorrow.
Looking back I will never regret taking those first steps, because even though candle making is not a part of my life anymore today (ok it very well might become under current tween pressure), it helped lay a firm foundation and teaching ground for me to take on the real world. And coming from a small town, far away from the city, those lessons were priceless.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step! Don’t be scared to start somewhere! If I knew what lay ahead, I probably would have been overwhelmed, so thank goodness for the veil. And just like the path of the initiate, it can be a daunting and challenging first step! But today I am so glad that I took them! I am so glad I became an independent entrepreneur, I am so glad I became an initiate 10 years ago and even though it hasn’t always been easy – I will not exchange these paths and experiences for anything in the world! They’ve made me what I am today. And sometimes people judge me for having this and having that (husband, house, kids, dogs, staff, businesses, travel or whatever pushes their button at the time), I just keep in mind, I’ve been working non-stop since I was 15 years old (my parents can justify to that). None of this happened overnight, and none of this came easy. I came full circle and I feel fulfilled, happy and at peace with my creation. I have only one wish, and that is for everyone, to find a place where they are happy with their creation and to fulfil their human potential to be divine on earth.
Love and Moonlight, Leonie